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Nous passons à côté des personnes brisées, celles dont la voix se fait rarement entendre, qui vivent des conflits dont nous n’avons pas idée. Nous savons que ce sont des personnes, mais nous ne les voyons jamais ainsi, car nous mettons des masques sur leurs visages.
Il est temps de nous débarrasser des stéréotypes associés à ceux qui vivent dans le Downtown Eastside, et d’enlever à ceux-ci les masques que nous leur avons prêtés.
Notre série de visages du quartier Downtown Eastside commence par Jay Kivell, intervenant au refuge Harbour Light.
Après avoir vécu dans la violence, la toxicomanie et l’itinérance, Jay Kivell, âgé de 38 ans, célèbre sa douzième année de sobriété en recevant la plus grande promotion de sa vie.
Élevé par une mère seule et alcoolique, Jay était tour à tour battu et négligé. « Elle m’a bien dit qu’elle n’avait pas souhaité ma naissance et que j’étais de trop. Quand j’avais huit ans, elle pouvait me laisser seul à la maison pendant une semaine. »
Lorsqu’il n’était pas obligé de se débrouiller seul, Jay était confié aux soins de la fille d’une amie de la famille. « Cette femme m’a agressé sexuellement à plusieurs reprises. Elle avait 18 ans, j’en avais 6, et j’ai vécu ces agressions jusqu’à l’âge de 12 ans. »
Jay n’a jamais révélé à personne ce qu’il vivait. « Je ne voulais pas créer de problèmes pour les autres. Je ne voulais pas m’attirer d’ennuis. À cet âge, je pensais que j’aurais des ennuis juste parce que je faisais partie du problème. »
Jay a commencé à fumer des cigarettes à l’âge de 12 ans. À 14 ans, il fumait de la marijuana et consommait de l’alcool. Dans la vingtaine, il était sans-abri et fumait du crack.
À 27 ans, alors qu’il vivait à Jasper, en Alberta, Jay a finalement touché le fond du baril et a fait une tentative de suicide. « En 12 heures, je me suis disputé avec mon patron, j’ai été jeté dans une cellule de dégrisement, expulsé de mon appartement, congédié et laissé par ma blonde. Je me suis rendu compte que ma dépendance menait ma vie. »
Jay s’est réveillé dans un lit d’hôpital, et a décidé de changer de vie. Le conseiller de l’hôpital lui a suggéré de participer au programme de traitement de la toxicomanie du Harbour Light, à Vancouver. Jay n’était jamais allé à Vancouver, et il a décidé d’essayer le traitement suggéré.
Il s’agissait de son septième (et dernier) traitement. Jay pesait 53 kilos quand il est descendu de l’autobus et s’est inscrit au programme. « Ils m’ont sauvé la vie, dit Jay en parlant des membres du personnel du Harbour Light. Ils m’ont ouvert les bras et m’ont accueilli, malgré mes noirs secrets. Ils ne m’ont pas jugé. »
Jay raconte qu’il n’a jamais fait de rechute après son traitement au Harbour Light, parce qu’il était enfin prêt à être honnête et à parler des blessures de son enfance. « J’ai finalement révélé mes secrets. J’ai pris ce risque et quand j’ai parlé, j’ai senti qu’un poids était tombé de mes épaules. Depuis, je n’ai jamais regardé en arrière. »
Pendant son traitement, Jay a commencé à faire du bénévolat tous les soirs au refuge. Après avoir terminé le programme – qui dure une année – il a été embauché par le Harbour Light à titre d’intervenant au refuge. « C’est le fait de savoir qu’il est possible de changer la vie de quelqu’un qui m’a attiré vers le travail au refuge », raconte Jay.
Jay vient d’avoir une promotion. Il est maintenant coordonnateur du refuge, et il participe à la gestion du personnel et des opérations dans les refuges du Harbour Light. « C’est tellement nouveau pour moi. Toute ma vie, on m’a dit quoi faire. Aujourd’hui, je peux guider les autres » explique-t-il.
Aujourd’hui, Jay est marié et père de deux jeunes fils, âgés de sept ans et neuf ans, qu’il considère comme une bénédiction. « Mes fils sont les meilleures choses qui me sont arrivées dans ma vie. Je fais tout ce que je peux pour qu’ils ne manquent de rien. »
« Je suis reconnaissant d’avoir la possibilité de donner à mes enfants ce que je n’ai jamais eu pendant mon enfance : de l’amour inconditionnel. »
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